I meant to write my first blog entry around the time Sergio posted his, but I was able to satisfactorily procrastinate until now. So, before I fill everyone in on the trip from Charleston to Durham, where we visited my oldest friend (in terms of the 25 years I have known her, as opposed to her still ever-so-youthful and vibrant 33 years of age) and her family, and Verona, VA, where are currently seated (at my dad's, in the kitchen), I would like to (finally) reflect on how we got to this moment- a fortnight before our flight to Spain, 1 week into a road trip, 2 dogs and 1 carload of our possessions, jobless and effectively homeless.
This is not the first time I have flown the coop of the good old US of A. In college, I did a year-long study abroad program in Germany and loved the experience, so much so, in fact, that when I had the chance to spend what initially was going to be a few months in a Spanish-speaking country (but ultimately stretched to a year in the foothills of the Andes in Ecuador and resulted in frequent trips back to visit my in-laws- what is sure to be the subject of another blog entry) before entering the CIA (it will be a really good post!), that I jumped on it. Needless to say, picking up and moving to another country for a while, acclimating to a new culture and trying to assimilate to a different language is not completely foreign to me, so to speak, and is actually a process and experience that I enjoy immensely.
I love being the ex-pat, observing all the different ways it is possible to live life, and picking and choosing the ones that fit me best. I love the process of learning a new language, measuring the success of my day by the conversations I manage to stumble through, the number of times I successfully make myself understood, and without resorting to an impromptu game of charades. I especially love exploring the food culture in a new country- sitting down with a menu and getting excited by pairings and flavors of which I have never conceived, saddling up to a bar and starting conversations with strangers over the favorite local brew, walking through the market and watching the human drama and minutae of the lives of another people play out.
All that being said, however, I have never moved or lived overseas quite like this. The biggest difference is that my adventure abroad was just that- my adventure and mine alone. I have never had a partner with whom to share the experience, someone with whom I can share the delights and the difficulties of being a stranger in a strange-ish land. Needless to say, I am thrilled to be doing this with Sergio. I feel like I have, against all odds, found a true companion in so many respects and am beyond excited to be sharing this journey and adventure with him.
Another significant difference between past adventures abroad and this trip to Spain is that I have never had to tie up so many loose ends before departing. Until about 3 years ago, I had never owned a house, and only had to wait out my rental lease before I could take off. I never had the possessions that one manages to accumulate after becoming a homeowner, or the obligatory dog that rounds out property ownership, not to mention the underlying well-paying job that enables all this accumulation, as well as 2 cats and everything for which Sergio was also responsible (including his own job of 14 years, house, dog and vehicle).
At the end of the day, we managed to sell my house and lease his, put all our belongings in a 10X20 storage unit, find homes for the 2 cats, get the paperwork in order to take our two pups (Max, the standard poodle, and Luke, the grinning lab/retriever mix, who will inevitably find their way into these posts) on this grand adventure, and leave both our jobs. As many balls in the air as we have been juggling, this shedding process has been surprising easy; things have really gone our way and while I am not a particularly spiritual person in general, I do believe that the universe has a way of encouraging certain paths and discouraging others. I like to say that we are following the breadcumbs, and thus far it has been incredibly easy for us to find and follow the next one down our path.
Another key departure from past overseas adventures is that, for once, I am moving to a country where I already have a fairly good grasp of the language. This is, without a doubt, a huge advantage, however, whereas in the past my goals and successes were largely defined by my progress in the foreign tongue, this time I am going to be focusing on other sorts of goals. Like Sergio, I feel incredibly lucky for all the blessings in my life- good health, loving parents, a constant and incredibly supportive inner circle of friends, 2 awesome dogs, a law license that provides a measured sense of future financial security and, even now, much to my astonishment, an amazing partner and best friend in Sergio.
However, unlike Sergio, I still have yet to find something to do, work wise, that excites me. During most of my 20's, I was on a quest to find that dream career- I tried on all sorts of professions and went down multiple paths, but never managed to turn anything into enough of a job that would offer me any semblance of a financial safety net. Law school was my Plan B, and while working as a banking-and-finance lawyer at Big Law has provided a financial security blanket, I did not, on too many levels, enjoy the work week (and, too often, the work weekends).
I had pretty much resigned myself to this reality until I met Sergio. Indulge me in the cheese for a minute, but in 2008 I divorced my aforehinted at Ecuadorian husband of 6 years and truly believed that I would never meet anyone with whom I could imagine sharing my life, because I resolved to never settle again. I did not believe in what I will shorthand describe as "true love" and, even if there was the rare exception, I would certainly never be the beneficiary of it. Statistically speaking, my options were to either settle or stay single. And I was really okay with the latter.
But meeting Sergio has changed my entire world perspective. The impossible no longer seems so. This applies to my personal life as well as my professional life. I now hold out hope and am going to try and find something that I find fulfilling- intellectually, emotionally and financially. This time in Spain is about identifying and pursuing whatever that is. I have always had an idea that I have a book in me, and I plan on finding out whether that is true. These blog entries will hopefully be the first baby steps in figuring that out.
I remember when I was a kid, and the teacher would assign an essay at the beginning of the school year, usually themed around something future-oriented, like expectations and goals for the coming year. The teacher would then hold on to it until the end of the year, when she would return the essay. It was sort of a Marty McFly moment of your future self encountering your past self. Past Annie had all sorts of ideas on what the future would look like, and future Annie had the chance to straighten past Annie out. I feel like this blog entry is my beginning-of-the-school-year essay and wonder what future Annie, who has experienced Spain and concluded this adventure, already looking forward to what her future has in store, will have to say about this post.
Stay tuned....
Present Annie
No comments:
Post a Comment